Most Africans have been through lots of trauma
I say Africans because our trauma is way deeper,
Unique and complicated and specific to us Africans
Everyone of us experienced trauma in different ways.
I was talking with a friend recently who told me that growing up, they slept on the bare floors from one relations house to another after the death of their father
They barely ate food
They barely had any fun
It was a hard life
To survive, they had to struggle
Many days going without food
And all his children and young adults life was laced with struggles and pains
And today, he lives a very angry life, angry with life, with how life has been unfair and this is affecting every aspect of his life
They were some of us who were taken as domestic slaves (house girls or house boys) at a very tender age and never knew what childhood looked like because it was snatched from you
You were a child but forced to become an adult at a very tender age
And now you are an adult, you crave to behave and act like a child without even knowing because you never had the chance to develop that phase of your life
They are some people who went through sexual abuse, physical abuse, and all kinds of abuse while growing up and have never talked about it but still feel hurt and bitter inside.
The little child within them is constantly upset leading to the outward characters the world sees
No one sees what is driving this nasty behavior
It’s childhood trauma
They are yet another set who have constantly experienced all kinds of abuse and are still doing so.
They never talk about it
It’s eating them up like cancer
So many use religion as a cover-up
And I have come to realise that as Africans,
There are too many people carrying baggages of childhood trauma around
It has destroyed their future, their relationships, their marriages, and their opportunities in life
The church is not helping matters as we were taught to take everything to God in prayers
Some have prayed for years yet they can’t shift the picture in their head
Many don’t even realise this is childhood trauma which is the most unfortunate part
These people have Education, certificates but their lives are complicated and full of obstacles because they haven’t dealt with what is biting them on the inside
A man is promiscuous today not because he wants to be but because he is empty and trying to fill a Vaccum which sex cannot fill unfortunately
A woman has become an angry woman today not because she wants to be but because she is fighting the trauma within her
Let’s start normalising conversations around CHILDHOOD TRAUMA within our Community
Do it with your friends
Your loved ones
You will be amazed how much pain and bitterness is still within that grown-up man or woman when they start talking.
Then decide to seek professional help if you can
The freedom that dealing with childhood trauma brings is indescribable.
I am available for us to talk on an appointment basis if you want and to signpost anyone to seek necessary help before it’s too late.